Over 21.5 million Americans suffer from some kind of substance abuse disorder, whether that’s with alcohol, cigarettes, or hard drugs. Thinking about those statistics, there’s a large chance that one of your children is suffering from addiction problems.
This is a problem that no father imagines himself dealing with. To see your children suffering from something you can’t physically protect them from is heartbreaking.
If you have a child suffering from addiction, you must be asking yourself how to be a good father and handle the situation properly. While there’s no one guide to tell you exactly what to do, we’re going to go over some tips that will help you handle this touch situation.
1. Understand Addiction
You can’t help something or someone that you don’t understand. It’s many people’s gut instinct to see addicts as weak or without willpower. “Why can’t they just stop?” you might be asking yourself.
But it’s more complicated than that. Addiction is a serious disease that changes how the brain works, how our emotions are processed, and how our bodies work physiologically.
Learning as much as you can about addiction, using drugs, and your child’s specific addiction will help you empathize and provide proper support.
2. Encourage New and Healthy Behaviors
It’s also easy to focus on the bad or negative behaviors with addicts. But this negative focus can lead to shame and guilt for the addict, which usually results in using more.
Instead, focus on positives. Encourage healthy behaviors like attending therapy or support groups. Set healthy boundaries and praise them for triumphs.
Provide support. A non-judgemental ear, a pat on the back, a hug, a shoulder to cry on, etc.
3. Provide Support Without Enabling
Support and positive communication are important, but don’t cross the line to enabling. Don’t make excuses for your child or excuse any unacceptable behavior.
If they relapse, for example, don’t say “it’s OK” because it isn’t. Tell them you’re sorry and you’ll help them get back on track. If they ask for money when you know they’re going to spend it on drugs, don’t give it to them.
You can show support without enabling their negative behaviors.
4. Stage an Intervention
Sometimes, addicts don’t realize the path their on or the seriousness of their situation. Interventions can show addicts that they have support, a community of people worried about them, and gives them a reality check to their situation.
Learn about interventions and find out if it’s right for your situation.
5. Don’t Forget About Yourself
As a dad, it’s easy to put your family and your children before yourself. You want to be a strong provider, so it’s easy to push down your own emotions or deny yourself care.
But addiction is exhausting for addicts and family members alike. You’re probably dealing with sadness, anger, denial, exhaustion, and more.
You can’t help others when you’re not helping yourself. Get help whether that’s with therapy, a trusted friend to talk to, a hobby, exercise, etc. Whatever you can do to show yourself self-care is going to be crucial throughout this whole process.
How to Be a Good Father to Children with Addiction Problems
While it might not be easy, it’s your responsibility as a parent to be there for your child as much as you possibly can. This guide on how to be a good father to children with addiction problems is far from comprehensive, but it can give you an idea of how to handle a situation that no parent wants for their child.
Want some more fatherly advice? We have an entire section on our website dedicated to fatherhood advice. Check it out.
